RIP Takeuchi Yuko and Park Ji Sun

The year 2020 has been a year full of losses. We got locked in our own homes, we have to stay far away from people, we cannot touch and hug our loved ones, we can no longer do most of the things that we enjoy, we cannot live the way we were used to. This is also a year in which we lost a lot of precious people. I cannot name them all, as the list is too long. But I want to mention two celebrities, who I want to remember and I can relate to. 

Takeuchi Yuko

The first time I saw her was in the Japanese TV series, Pride (starring Kimura Takuya and it made me interested in ice hockey), and I remember her the most by her bright smile. In retrospect, I wonder what she was hiding behind that smile. I used to smile a lot too. I read somewhere that even though you may feel really bad, just by making the smile motion with your mouth, the brains will produce something like a drug that will make you feel happy. It may have worked during my deepest pains, but other people may have found it creepy looking. I could care less, as surviving was my main priority. But I can imagine how weird it must be for others, a bright smile with eyes full of anger or pain. Maybe, something like the Joker or the villain in soap operas, who laughs behind someone's back, while pretending to be angry for being falsely accused or having fake tears. I read that she has given birth in January this year, while she is 40 years old. I don't know for sure, but it could be postpartum depression, which is by the way, nothing to be ashamed off, the harrassment from people who thinks that she is too old to be a mom or incapable in any other way, or the stress from expecting herself to do everything (being a mom, a wife, a daughter, a celebrity, and an actress) perfectly. 

Park Ji Sun

I don't know her well, but I remember her from her short appearances in my favorite Korean TV shows. I love watching comedic shows, as once again, making the smile motion with my mouth and even better, making the laughing sounds for real, pulls me out of the depression. I read about the struggles she had with her looks and skin problems. Viewers actually complained about her bare, no makeup face, while her skin couldn't handle makeup. She was having such a hard time, that she was even unable to sleep as the sheets cut into her skin. I had serious skin issues too. I don't know if it is the stress, the beatings, the torture, the hate, which made me hate myself so much that my body decided to attack itself (look up autoimmune diseases if you are unfamiliar with it). I know how painful it can be and the continuous pain and lack of sleep can make you believe that it may never end. 

In order for their deaths to not be in vain is to remember them and their heritage (their message to the world, their ideas, their work, etc.) and the lessons that we can learn from it, and create change. The pandemic has made our worlds smaller, in good and bad ways. We can no longer run away from our problems. There are no more distractions and no more excuses for not doing the right thing. We have time to really look eachother in the face and take care of eachother. We can remove the stigma on mental problems (You don't just lock crazy people up and throw away the key. They are normal people like you and me, who have experienced abnormal things) and we can talk more about our problems. It is not a sign of weakness to show your vulnerability and ask for help. You don't have to put up a smile and endure. A bit of pressure can make people perform better than expected, but sometimes, too much is too much. Always make sure you get enough sleep (and don't abuse medicine). It is the main thing that is keeping you sane enough to deal with your daily struggles. Even with a newborn baby, rash that is keeping you up all night, crazy thoughts that keeps on repeating, find ways to squeeze in a nap.  

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