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Happy Birthday to me

Yesterday was my birthday and it was a strange feeling. Never in my wildest dreams did I ever imagine to make it this far. I always tell people that I am living in my extra time, as I should have already died, when I was a few years old. During that time, everybody kept telling me that I was too young to go, that I still had a whole life ahead of me. But they don't understand what it feels like to continuously get damaged by people, when nobody is looking, and whenever I spoke up about it, nobody believed me or supported me. I was too little to be in such a horrible survival mode. Like a punching bag waiting to get pushed around and with no hands to protect or defend myself. It has really made me question whether those people who told my parents that I was a waste of rice (Chinese saying that loosely means that whatever food they feed me with is the same as throwing it in the garbage) and that they should just abandon me, when I was a baby, were right. They said that there was no …

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